Charm your crush or your next Tinder date with these goofy dad jokes
What’s more attractive than a sense of humor? The next time you try to chat up a cutie at a bar or slide into your crush’s DMs, win ‘em over with a tried-and-true joke—and not just any joke, a cheesy, clever, cringeworthy (but in a good way) dad joke. We’ve listed a plethora of them for you below: take your pick and watch the hotties melt before you.
Steps
Flirty Jokes
- Secure yourself a date with a cheesy—but sexy—pick-up line. Whether you’ve met someone on the street or on the apps, win them over with a clever dad joke that also doubles as a pick-up line. Are they silly? Of course! Are they surefire ways to get a total babe laughing, blushing, and saying “Yes” to a night on the town with you? Also yes!
- “Are you a loan? Because you sure have my interest!”
- “Any chance you’ve got an extra heart? Mine’s been stolen!”
- “Is your last name Campbell? Because you’re mm mm good!”
- “Even in zero gravity, I’d fall for you.”
- “You must be made of Copper and Tellurium—because you’re CuTe!”
- “There’s something wrong with my phone. Your number’s not in it!”
- “You’re so beautiful that you made me forget my pickup line.”
- “I was blinded by your beauty; I’m going to need your name and phone number for insurance purposes.”
- “I volunteer as your victim tonight since you're clearly dressed to kill.”
- “Are you a charger? Because I’m dying without you.”
- “Life without you is like a broken pencil…pointless.”
- “Are you the lottery? Because I’m delusional and I think I’ve got a chance.”
- “Are you a campfire? Because you’re hot and I want s’more!”
- “When a penguin finds its mate, they stay together forever. Will you be my penguin?”
- “Can I follow you home? My parents always told me to follow my dreams.”
- “Is Liam Neeson your dad? Because I’m TAKEN with you!”
- “I want to be your handbag so I never leave your side.”
- “Do you like Nintendo? Because Wii sure would look good together!”
- “Aside from being extremely hot, what do you do for a living?”
- “Do you like raisins? How do you feel about a date?”
- “Hey, my name’s Microsoft. Can I crash at your place tonight?”
Dirty Jokes
- Kick things up a notch with a funny, sexy compliment. There’s a time and a place for dirty jokes, but if you get good vibes from your crush or date, they might be receptive to a joke that toes the line of propriety. If you want to spice things up with your date, try one of these bad boys.
- “I don’t want to have kids with you, but I’m happy to help you practice.”
- “My bed is broken. Can I use yours?”
- “Did you just come from a bakery? Because you’ve got the hottest pair of buns I’ve seen all week.”
- “I can’t find my treasure anywhere. Can I search your chest and see if it’s there?”
- “Well, lucky me. I’ve checked off my whole to-do list except for one thing: you.”
- “You’re so sexy,
- “I’ve got to admit, I was feeling a little off earlier. But the minute you walked in, you turned me on.”
- “You’ll have to excuse me if I seem a little off tonight. I just watched a documentary about the water crisis, and I feel like I have to do something. Will you shower with me to conserve water?”
- “I hope you never change, but leave your clothes off if you do.”
- “You must have been born on the moon because your body is out of this world.”
- “Want to help me get on Santa’s naughty list this year?”
Funny Jokes
- Wow them with your wit, flirty or not. Who said pick-up lines need to be flirty? You can charm a cutie with a run-of-the-mill dad joke—even if it’s not sexy, per se. Get ‘em laughing and you’ve got ‘em loving!
- “Q: Who’s the loneliest billionaire? A: Alone Musk.”
- “Q: What do you call a fish wearing a bowtie? A: Sofishticated.”
- “Did you hear about the restaurant on the moon? Great food, no atmosphere.”
- “Q: Why is the divorce rate so high with tennis players? A: To them, love means nothing.”
- “I didn’t think orthopedic shoes would help, but I stand corrected.”
- “I’m reading a book about anti-gravity. It’s impossible to put down.”
- “If you think swimming with dolphins is expensive, you should try swimming with sharks. It cost me an arm and a leg.”
- “Q: What do you call a criminal landing an airplane? A: Con descending.”
- “My doctor said I should do lunges to stay in shape. That would be a big step forward.”
- “I tell dad jokes, but I don’t have any kids. That’s right: I’m a faux pa.”