Oksana Akinshina for ProPedia: “I’m a tough mother, and at home I can’t have a speck of dust or a speck of dust”.

The star of “Hipsters” and “Vysotsky” now appears in films no more than twice a year. The enfant terrible of Russian cinema turned into a serious actress and, in parallel with her professional growth, became a mother of many children. Akinshina has two sons and a daughter, and these real achievements are more important to her than the mythical Oscar and new lines in her filmography. We would never have thought that one day we would have a leisurely conversation with Akinshina about home comfort, but nevertheless, she decided to tell ProPedia about it, as well as about family values ​​and the intricacies of her craft.

ProPedia: What helps a couple start a new chapter in their relationship?

O.A.: There is a mythical feeling that we call love. This is not the first meeting, not passion, but something deeper and inexplicable.

You may at some moments hate and despise your loved one, but love still allows you to overcome difficulties. This is the kind of thing that doesn’t allow you to just pick up and go your separate ways, it preserves everything.

ProPedia: Who should work more on relationships - a woman or a man?

O.A.: This is a task for two. But men and women do things differently. Representatives of the stronger sex sometimes have to be reminded that they, too, must make an effort. Each of us goes through our own path, and we need to learn to accept the choice of another person.

In a relationship, the main thing is experience and calmness, and I learned this. And I had good teachers.

ProPedia: What is your relationship secret?

O.A.: Everything is mixed here: chemistry, circumstances, actions, restraint. Sometimes you need to remain silent, sometimes you need to shout - all at the same time. There is no perfect cocktail, everything varies.

ProPedia: How can the birth of a child affect a couple’s life?

O.A.: Children cannot fix something, but they raise relationships to a more mature level. You begin to react to many things differently. Previously, because of some situation, you spent a lot of nerves and tears, but as time passed, you realized what nonsense it was.

Children give endurance and calmness. And everything unnecessary is eliminated by itself. For example, in my case, when my first son was born, I became only a little quieter. With the birth of my second child, I feel much wiser and calmer. (Oksana Akinshina gave birth to her eldest son, Philip, in 2009 from businessman Dmitry Litvinov. The youngest son, Konstantin, was born in 2013, daughter Emmy in 2017, their father is producer Archil Gelovani, approx. ProPedia)

This is interesting!

• Oksana Akinshina showed a photo from the christening of her charming 2-year-old daughter

ProPedia: Your path to family was not easy. Maybe we shouldn’t have rushed into the birth of our eldest son, but first we should have made sure that we had chosen the right life partner?

O.A.: I don’t think I rushed with my first pregnancy; I didn’t have to wait for anything. Children cannot be a bad experience at all.

ProPedia: What are your sons’ personalities? Are they similar to you?

O.A.: They are very flexible, calm, self-possessed, cheerful, and at the same time they strive to discover something new for themselves every day. I am different. Apparently, I raise them in dissonance with myself. My youngest son Kostya, who is one year and 10 months old, can calmly watch the performance for an hour and a half and not disturb anyone.

In general, my children are very well-mannered, maybe because I am a tough mother. I don’t have screams or hysterics, I don’t raise my voice at them, but I force them to strictly follow the regime. By the way, my nanny is also tough.

I allow my sons to watch TV - only with their parents. They are not obsessed with gadgets because they don't have them. I can show my son something on my tablet or phone, but he himself should not depend on technology. He cannot watch a cartoon from his gadget - only in the evening on TV. And the sons fall asleep in seconds. It’s very difficult to raise like this, I haven’t seen this in many places, but it’s convenient for me and for the children too. I am convinced that any child can be balanced: don’t cry in a cafe, don’t scream on the plane, don’t freak out before bed. You can make it so that the mother says: “Good night son, I love you,” turns off the light and the child is already asleep after 5 minutes. It depends on the approach: it’s a matter of rigor, cyclicality, and routine.

ProPedia: How did having children affect your career?

O.A.: I never took her too seriously. In general, career is a strange word for me; I prefer “project.” Honestly, now I sometimes think: “It’s better to work than to blow my mind at home.” But still, for me, children are much more important than a career. As I got older, I learned to switch off during filming. If before I was only concerned with my head at home, now I get a huge thrill when I forget myself while working.

Family is an integral part of my life, and it has always been and will always come first. I have a mom and dad, they love me and each other very much, despite the fact that they don’t live together.

We have never had a special family clan that gathers around a large table for the holidays. So now I want to make up for it. I determine the filming schedule according to the rhythm of my life, rather than building my life according to the filming schedule. There are families in which the concept of “home” is genetically transmitted. It is easier for a woman in marriage later, because there is an established system of communication with a man. This was not the case in my family.

ProPedia: What does home mean to you?

O.A.: This is a very abstract concept. For me, home is children, a dog, a fireplace and a husband. This is a place where you are welcome, where you can be calm.

ProPedia: Do you have time for yourself?

O.A.: I learned to organize my life - I need it so that I have enough time for myself and for others. I spend my free time at the beauty salon, meeting with girlfriends, and taking care of the house. I can say that I succeeded as a housewife, although not as a cook.

If I freak out, I start cleaning. My husband wants to shoot himself every day because of this. I know exactly in which corner the sock is in my house. We cannot have a speck of dust or speck anywhere. If I have a dirty cup in my kitchen, I will lie there all night and think about it, and then I will still get up and wash it. This didn’t come after marriage, I’ve always been like this.

ProPedia: How do you imagine your future?

O.A.: I haven’t made plans for a long time, because it gets in the way. This sets boundaries. Let's say you might really want a red sweater. But it’s not in the store now, because it’s winter, but there are blue sweaters with deer. And you won’t get it, even if you kill yourself. I only know that I will always live with my children, my spouse, my parents. I'm enjoying today, in a good way.

Photo: Starface, Persona Stars, PhotoXPress